Political Revelations

I had a religious epiphany today.  No, I haven’t rediscovered Jesus Christ as my personal savior; that’s not going to happen any time soon. 

I have been vaguely watching all the freaks coming out of the woodwork who want to represent the Republican Party in the next presidential election, and the Republicans are not representing well right now.  There’s a crazy, big-mouthed bitch who whines about big government and welfare entitlements while she collects farm subsidies and foster care stipends.  There’s the mafia pizza guy who wants to market a political campaign to America for $9.99.  There’s a Texan (another one?!) who didn’t have the foresight to censor the word nigger from various landscaping displays and who likes Prayvaganzas.  And then there’s Mitt Romney.

I’m not going to lie; I have said from the beginning that I could never vote for anyone who believes in golden tablets, golden glasses to read those tablets, and that Jesus took a detour to North America before ascending into heaven.  (And that pesky alien planet business which is shadily close to the Scientology bullshit.)  I have a problem with the logic behind believing ridiculously childish things about the BIG IDEAS in life. 

But … I think as soon of that jackass Robert Jeffress (the Dallas evangelical pastor who introduced Perry at the religion-a-thon in Texas) called Mormonism a “cult,” the religious right seriously fucked up.  Jeffress said that people “who are born-again followers of Christ should always prefer a competent Christian to a competent non-Christian.”  Wow.  That crosses a number of boundaries for me.  First of all, what a dick.  What a worthless, childish, myopic, self-impressed ass-wipe.  Romney should be happy that such a prominent “Christian” would talk smack in such a counter-productive way.  Rick Perry knew Jeffress was going to say that no matter how many times he denies being complicit. 

Just like John F. Kennedy, Romney is having to defend his religion rather than his politics.  People were freaking out that JFK might answer to the pope in a crisis rather than the American people (ridiculous – he wasn’t a priest), so he had to defend his personal religious beliefs.  Ultimately, (as we all know) JFK won.  Good for him.   Religion should be irrelevant.  But I was making it a voting issue, which is childish and reactionary.  While his religion might be cause for me to pause and think, it should not be cause for me to discredit him entirely. 

                I am not religious.  I don’t discredit the idea of a god, but I vehemently discredit religion as a conduit of god.  Religion perverts any bigger meaning by trying to control people.  Even the bible creates a case for separation of church and state, when Jesus says, “my kingdom is not of this world,” implying that there is a difference between the here and the hereafter.  What I was doing in denying Mitt Romney my consideration was acknowledging my propensity towards a Christian ideology (since that’s how I was raised) and thus (inadvertently) condoning a theocracy inclined towards Christianity, and I don’t believe morality is dictated by religion.  People are either ethical or not.  They cheat or they don’t.  Identification with one religion or another doesn’t make people better or worse; it’s just a label.  Actions do, in fact, speak louder than words. 

(And P.S., not one of the current candidate deserves my vote so far.  No one.)

Crazy Bitches

Society in 2011 has hit some sort of pinnacle of individual narcissism.  We all seem to think that every thing we think needs to be broadcast somewhere so that people can look at and admire it.  I am guilty of it right this second, as I type away on this essay which will end up on my blog later tonight.  I write to express myself and to vent happiness, anger, or frustration, but rather than just saving the words to a flash drive or printing them out to fill the pages of an empty binder, I will send the words into cyber-oblivion in a vain attempt to reach an audience that probably doesn’t exist.  Individuals sharing with the world is a phenomenon that’s been going on forever, but in the technologically advanced world of today, we can now over-share every single event in our lives. 

Example … facebook.  When I log on, I check for any messages, and will occasionally post a cryptic message or a semi-insightful thought or a rhetorical question, but that’s it.  I rarely read my newsfeed, because some of the stupid shit people post on facebook absolutely baffles me:  “I ate a sandwich!”  “I took a shit!”  “My toe hurts!”  “FML!  LOL!  WTF?!”  Not even the people who like us care about 90% of the stuff we post online.  And Twitter is even worse.  Just a bunch of truncated bullshit to express random disassociations:  “I’m so drunk!”  “Going to Amy’s!”  “Just got laid!”  Who cares?

But even so, I post on facebook and I read my “friends” postings, because I am interested in their lives to some extent.  Here’s what I’m NOT interested in:  other women’s vaginas.  Seriously. 

I was reading the paper tonight and saw a most distressful display of self-importance.  A woman in New York City decided that, as the “highest performance of art,” she would give birth to her child in an art gallery.  Apparently the art gallery was desperate for any sort of foot traffic, so they agreed to let her create a bedroom-like “home-birth” center, where she spent as much of her time as possible (during gallery hours) talking to visitors about “motherhood, art, and other issues”.  Oh my god.  Yes, giving birth is meaningful, but some woman’s egotistical idea that people beyond her friends and family give a shit about her adding to the overpopulation of the world is a annoying.  People are popping out babies all over the world every second (some of stopping work only long enough to deliver the baby and keep working), and this crazy bitch has the nerve to loaf around an art gallery all day orating about her vagina and what is going to soon bloom out of it?  I feel sorry for that kid. 

Yes giving birth can be a beautiful thing, but it should also be mostly private – kind of like going to the bathroom.  The only people who like to watch others’ bodily functions are perverts and/or fetishists.  She videotaped it (of course) for people to see whenever they feel like watching a woman’s cervix dilate and then see a bloody new person come screaming into the world.  I imagine if she has a facebook account, it was probably her status for the day.  Twitter feed:  “contractions!!  FUUUUUUCK!”

Maybe sometimes we ought to censor ourselves just a little to keep the mystery alive.  Maybe we don’t need to announce every emotion we experience throughout the day.  Maybe taking our own sassy picture in the mirror is a little bigheaded and unnecessary.  Or … maybe because we’ve digressed into a small-talking, small-minded, idiocracy; unfounded arrogance is all we have to offer.

I want …

I want Curtis Stone to come to my house to cook me dinner.  I want to be innocently (and ignorantly) roaming the aisles at some grocery store and have him stride up to me and offer to cook me a meal. 

Something amazing, which I could not make myself (which is basically everything, since I am a shitty cook).  *And then he can move in and service me in a variety of domestic ways.

I want a pool in my back yard.  Preferably something with a shield of some sort so I don’t startle the neighbors with my nakedness and/or invite the perverty old  guys to watch me sun bathe (just like they watch me do anything and everything when I’m outside.)

I want a book deal.  I may or may not have the attention span to write any books, but I want the book advance money to sit around and write whatever makes me feel happy, while still getting paid.

I want a domestic servant who will clean my house.  Actually, I want a maid/carpenter/plumber/ nanny/ hairdresser/ accountant/ lawyer/ masseuse.  Immediately.  Preferably a hot one. 

I want the ability to teleport to any location at any time.  I should be able to touch the people I want to come with me, and then we all go to New Zealand or Croatia or Hawai’i or Fiji or New York City.  (I don’t think this is asking too much.)

I want a redo button for my life.  Like, “oops!  That was stupid!” and then I rewind and do that bit over.  Or an editing tool where I can go in and get rid of the pesky bits that piss me off. 

I want Indian food right now.  (Where is that bastard Curtis Stone when you need him?!)

I want a Sleep Number bed.  I’ve never actually been on one, but the commercials told me that’s what I want, and I believe them.

I want to have the body I had at 22, and the wisdom I have now.  Again, I don’t think that’s asking too much.  Why do people learn and grow intellectually, but disintegrate physically?!  What a crock of shit.

I want sand in my toes on a daily basis.  And I don’t mean playground sand; I mean Richard Branson’s private island sand. 

I want to be friends with cool, eccentric people like Fran Leibowitz and Woody Allen and Johnny Depp and Clint Eastwood and Eddie Vedder and Sean Penn and Guillermo del Toro.

I want to be friends with cool, eccentric dead people like Jim Morrison and Hunter S Thompson and George Orwell and Jesus (?) and Friedrich Nietzsche and Simone de Beauvoir and William S Burroughs.

I want to write a screenplay that wins an Academy Award, even though I haven’t the slightest idea how to do it and don’t care enough to find out.

I want all food to be equally nutrient.  I want to eat whatever I want.  All the time.  I want to eat seven candy bars, and have it not make me puke.  I want to drink two bottles of wine without losing consciousness.  I want to eat out at restaurants every other day, and I want a driver to take me there so I can have cocktails and not get arrested on the way home.

I want some semblance of financial security.  You know what?  Fuck that.  I want to be obscenely rich and give half away to charities that impress me.  Like the one that gives away ducks.

I want to bitch slap a Somali pirate.  (Don’t ask questions…I’m on a roll.)

I want a PhD without all the hassle. 

I want my children to grow up to be good human beings, even though society actively tries to make them assholes every day.

I want to move to California and be assured that it will not fall into the Pacific Ocean while I’m there.

I want all my cheese slices proportionate to my Triscuits.

I want this one girl I really hate to win the lottery and then realize she lost the ticket.  (Bitch)

I want … maybe just to sleep through the night tonight.   That would be a good start on the things I want from this life.  

The "Rules”

I can’t use profanity.  It’s in bad taste and doesn’t reflect the standard of language which educators should use in public.

I can’t rag on the government.  They fund my paychecks.

I can’t talk about education.  Parents want their kids’ teachers to be confident in the school system.

Hmmm… what’s left … ?

Sunshine and butterflies.  Moonbeams.  Vanilla ice cream with sprinkles. 

Suburbia.  Sand castles.  Scented markers.

Leafy vegetables.  Show tunes.  Spongebob Band-Aids.

Alice in Wonderland.  Where the Sidewalk Ends.  The Bible.

(Wait, that last one is pretty incendiary.)

Sharia law.  Corporate Entitlement.  9% Unemployment.  Exxon Mobile.  Westborough Baptist Church.

Maybe we ought to focus on the real problems in society.  Just a thought.

 I swear like a sailor.  Rick Perry has a rock emblazoned with the name Niggerhead …  Which one is more offensive?  And which one of us is running for president?  So I can’t say fuck, but Rick Perry has a rock lying around with one of the most racially insensitive words a person can use on it and he still has a shot at running America? 

Which one of these is more offensive:  I have a job; my husband has three.  We had to pay $5000 in income taxes this year.  General Electric got a refund.  That offends me.  I can’t afford to repay the loans for my failed business.  General Motors got bailed out by the federal government to compensate for its failures.   Offensive.

 Schools have to cut programs just to keep buildings open.  But billions of United States tax dollars are being daily shipped to foreign countries in some warped attempt at buying alliances with countries whose people hate America and want the soldiers to leave.   That’s so far beyond offensive that it might border on being perverted. 

So someone is going to have to explain to me what’s offensive and what’s not, because I think I got the wrong memo.

Gadhafi & Sons

                  Mussolini, Stalin, Hitler, Ho Chi Minh, Zedong, Castro, Amin, Pol Pot, Milosevic.  Gadhafi.  All bad men.  Men who collectively took the lives of tens of millions of people throughout history.  I don’t like them.  I’m not here to defend them, but I think it’s safe to say that these power-hungry, totalitarian dictators are just a microcosm of what’s wrong with humankind.  People have such a strong, primal, instinctive, destructive, vengeful, war-like nature that it is predictable that tyrannical men would rise to power to control the masses; and then fall from grace. 

                It is only natural that people would hate Moammar Gadhafi; he was a brutal dictator for 42 years, ruling over Libya with an iron fist.  Historically, he treated people poorly, was nepotistic in his rule, and pitted factions against each other to keep control of the country, but it is also arguably true that he maintained a certain balance between the tribal factions and religious groups in the country.  Now that he is gone, we can see the people’s true nature.  Just watch one of the videos online.  Gadhafi may have been a horrible man, but where is the joy in seeing a person beaten nearly to death, sodomized with a knife, tied to the hood of a car to be paraded in front of others, and then shot in the head?  Is that justice?  Is humankind still so animalistic that torture is the answer?  Or was it all about bringing him down to their level – degrading him as much as possible?  Because what I see on those videos is the degradation of all of those men.  The rebels were basking in their victory; a grievously bloodied Gadhafi is dragged about in a public display of “manliness” by the rebels, surrounded by smiling facing all around.  Grinning, smiling, beaming faces of Libyan rebels.  How repulsive.

                I don’t find the death of anyone to be particularly celebratory.  I didn’t take pleasure in hearing the news of Osama bin Laden’s assassination.  bin Laden was a religious fanatic who had a plan to cripple the western world.  Did he carry that plan out himself?  No.  Thousands of other people did it for him; they listened to his message of intolerance and religious supremacy, and they carried out hideous crimes in the name of god.  God, Allah - same thing, different name.  When he was killed, Americans went out in the street to celebrate.  They announced his death with jubilation, but what they failed to see was that he was just an old Middle Eastern guy who had already been stripped of any real power.  With all those past tyrants, it took armies of men to carry out their will.  They were not alone; people chose to follow them and do their bidding. 

                Gadhafi is dead.  Great.  Let’s see what happens in Libya.  Let’s see if the Islamic fundamentalists who take over are any better for the people than Gadhafi was.  Let’s celebrate THAT if it happens rather than relishing the public torture and subsequent death of one man.  Mutilating a corpse is vile, disturbing and alarming.  People ought to ask themselves what they are happy about – what is being celebrated by freezing his dead body and putting it on public display next to his dead sons.  That’s not the evolutionary progress of mankind; that’s Dark Ages mentality.  Did those soldiers who fired off celebratory shots with their machine guns stop to think about the innocent civilians they were shooting?  No.  Why?  Because they were too hell-bent on parading a corpse around. 

                I’m not happy for the rebels who killed him; I’m embarrassed for them.  What a bunch of assholes.

Your Mind is a Terrible Thing to Waste

My thoughts are still very much stuck in the censorship mode.  Every word I type becomes a potential liability for later.  I think about each word’s impact, how it could be construed (or misconstrued), and why people are so invasively concerned about other peoples’ words. 

                Margaret Atwood keeps speaking to me; her running dialogue is constantly in the back of my mind saying that language is power.  Taking away language is stripping a person of power.  There has to be a mechanism – a machine – which controls.  Gives and takes away rights and privileges.  And she whispers to me in clipped phrases about the danger inherent in taking away peoples’ words, how repressive and scary a totalitarian society would be.  Then my brain starts adding to her warnings, and I realize we are moving rapidly toward an anti-intellectual society already.  Citizens hand over their right to engage in the political process by paying other people to think for them.  Regardless of whether people tend toward the right or the left, there are talking heads on tv and radio who will simply tell them what to think and how to vote.  No pesky and time-consuming research needed.  George Orwell said that if we don’t think, someone else will do it for us.  They are already doing it.

                Books are already going away.  People don’t read as much anymore because of the omnipresent background of television, the immediate access to the internet, the instant distraction of the cellular phones, and the gaming systems which provide hours of diversion.  Borders didn’t go out of business because people are reading all their books on a Kindle; it went out of business because people don’t read books like in the past.  Reading is a luxury; it’s time consuming, and sitting down with a cup of coffee and a blanket to read for an hour has been redefined as counterproductive in 2011 America.  The implication is that you ought to be DOING something, even if that thing is just stalking facebook for people you graduated with.  What would George Orwell think?  He is my new answer to the question, “who from history would you go back and spend the afternoon with?”  I’m not trying to sound alarmist – I don’t foresee my constitutional rights being taken away in the near future – BUT … it wouldn’t be too hard for the government to do so when people choose not to be informed all the time.

                The best action is the common sense one.  Logic tells me that sitting on my ass in front of the tv or the computer is not in my best interest.  The watching is actively making me stupid and destroying my attention span.  Reading requires patience and imagination.  Words allude and connote and imply and suggest when they are written well, and the thinking associated with such verbiage is what makes people smarter, because it engages the mind in something beyond looking, receiving, or accepting.  The best books are not necessarily the easiest ones to read.  Twilight, for example, must have been “good” if so many people read it, but the movie came closely behind and made it unnecessary to read the book.  Just stare at the pretty people on the screen and eat your popcorn.  Hand over your money and someone will think for you. 

                Or … read things that cause explosions of revelation in your mind.  Pick up Nietzsche or Dostoevsky or Pessoa or Singer or Camus or Eliot.  Bend your thoughts around the rigid formations already ingrained and bask in language.  Try active rather than passive. 

Censorship Sucks

“Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself.”  -  Dick Cavett

  I have no messiah or martyr complex, but I do have a voice.  I have things to say, none of which have anything to do with anyone else.  Allow me a brief political, historical precedent …

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

                While other people may not like my opinion or my language or my ideology, others’ dissent does not require me to stifle my voice.  The United States government has given me the right to express myself, and no person has the right to take that away from me.  I may be a teacher, but I am not a slave to the educational system.  I will not silence myself just because a handful of prudish and anti-intellectual individuals who don’t know me at all want to shove a gag in my mouth.  What is our political system if not a medium to advocate ideas and dialogue about the world?  I don’t wear a burqa or an abaya; this is not the Middle East, nor is America a communist nation.  

                Many of the things which I post online will contain political and educational and personal opinions which I simply want to share with friends and like-minded people.  Apparently some people in society think that certain people's constitutional rights should not be the same as theirs because of the context of a job contract.  Because it is my first amendment right, I will say politically sensitive things occasionally.  I will discuss ideas about education, because that is the field to which I have devoted my life.  I will occasionally litter my speech with profanity, because language can be a powerful tool of expression.  None of these things will be done to offend anyone; I can’t control what other people think.  What’s offensive to one person is common sense to another.

                I have devoted the past 12 years to encouraging people to stand up for themselves, to be heard, to take advantage of learning opportunities, and to think for themselves.  What kind of hypocrite would I be if I simply did nothing when my civil liberties were being compromised? 

  It’s my obligation as  to stand up for what I believe in rather than behaving like a sheep.  I may have accepted the herd mentality when I was a child, and even to an extent throughout my education in college, but I’m an adult now.  I will not blindly follow arbitrary rules which compromise my rights as a citizen.  I will not bend to simple-minded parents who are afraid that their children might encounter new and radical ideas.  I deserve the right to speak in whatever forum I see fit.   I will exercise the right to leave my job at the door when I check out at the end of the day like millions of other Americans.  Balance requires a healthy separation of personal and professional life.  It’s only fair that everyone in society be afforded the right to step out of their job – to not be wholly defined by it - and just be themselves.  If you don’t like my blog, don’t read it. 


  As Voltaire once said, “Think for yourselves and let others enjoy the privilege to do so, too.”