Dear Lance

I know that what I write has a limited audience.  I am honest.  Most people are not.  I accept the reality of my life and my choices.  Most people want to believe in a certain version of themselves.  (Generally a self-inflated version)

It's cool.  We shouldn't be judging each other,  even though that's what happens every day, all the time. 

Here's the thing:  we all have certain people who are important in our lives.  For some of us (me), those people are very far and few between.  So when someone I care about wants to talk to me about something, I listen.  Even when I don't want to.  Because that's what love is about:  shutting the fuck up for a minute while someone you respect is talking.  Even if you don't agree.  Even when what that person is saying doesn't vibe with your belief system. 

People always say that life is short, but I truly believe that I'm a fucking highlander or something, because I feel like this life is interminable.  The bullshit I have to endure from both my own brain and then from other people's jaded version of reality is unnecessary.  Sometimes days feel like years, and moments drag on forever. 

If you love someone, listen.  If you care, empathize.  If you respect someone, due diligence requires more than simply showing up.

I don't know you.  I never will.   And if your wife is smart (as I know she is) she won't read this to you.  But I have her back, even if you don't.  I know what it feels like to be marginalized and gas-lighted and made to feel inadequate and/or manipulable. 

Stop it. 

Teaching & Verbal Vomit

I honestly can't believe the level of entitlement and apathy crawling through the hallways of high school.  I understand the Breakfast Club ideology, where the janitor tells the grumpy teacher that the kids aren't getting worse, he's just getting old.  Maybe that's true.  Maybe I'm bitter.  Maybe 21 years teaching is too many.  And maybe, kids are getting worse. 

Here's the thing:  High school often sucks.  I was a fairly shitty student myself.  I barely passed through my senior year and I skipped classes almost every day.  I get it.  But I'm fucking exhausted from caring on behalf of other people.  Their apathy rubs off - it's toxic. 

According to the Washington Post, 17% of teachers quit the profession in the first 5 years, and another 8% quit annually.  Teaching can be very fulfilling, but it also has a tendency to take over your life.  As an English teacher, the mountains of paper alone are enough to drive a person completely mad.  I have over-achieving AP students who push themselves to be better and more educated, and I have seniors who can barely read, don't know what punctuation is, and actively bitch every day about having to do basic tasks. 

Here's a thought:  high school is not for everyone.  What are we doing keeping all kids locked up in school until they're 18 years old, when not all of them need to be there?  We should be encouraging students to graduate early, to take classes online, to figure out what they want to do, and then help them do it.  Yes, some people need all four years of high school.  But not everyone.  It's a waste of time and energy and resources to force students who hate school and refuse to participate to stay enrolled.  Let them go.  No Child left Behind sounds like a good motto, until you realize that some children systematically try to be left behind. 

A high school diploma should be earned.  Many students just expect it to be handed to them, even if they do nothing.  And some teachers, counselors, and administrators will bend over backwards to fudge grades - just get little Johnny to a 59.5% so he passes.  Move him along the system, even he can barely read and hasn't turned in a single assignment all semester. 

That's bullshit.  School should be a meritocracy.  You should have to EARN a diploma, not just show up periodically. 

Change.  One of these days I'll figure out how to help change this nonsense.  Or, more likely, I'll end up in that 8% statistic who leaves.  The only thing keeping me here right now is my paycheck and my benefits.  If I could find any way to leave here, I'd already be gone.

Bullshit

Writing online is a fool’s errand. No one listens. My autocorrect tells a different story. Fuck social media

School shootings

As it turns out, the label" school shootings" and the title "school shooting" and the fact that this is the third time I've typed "school shootings" into this blog entry will make some robot cyber-troller hit this blog post a hundred times.  

What a stupid, American fact. 

P.S. The internet is watching all of us, all the time.  

#bekind

Academia

Just so you know, in case you aren't in the field of education, teachers are forced to read books written by people who sell books to teachers.  These people have advanced degrees in education, which (if you do a simple google search) are a dime a dozen and available online.  An MA in Education is not impressive.  It's a way for teachers to make more money.  Period.  If they wanted to be better at their jobs, they would get advanced degrees in their subject areas. 

So, to break it down, schools buy books on teaching for all their teachers in order to inflate the income of people who write books about simplistic ideology about teaching. 

I thought that's what I got three college degrees to do. 

I thought that's what I've spent the past 22 years doing.  Teaching. 

Why are school districts subsidizing the income of people who take a simple concept, wrap it in academic nonsense words, then sell it back to schools?

The education system is broken.  If you are a student, pay attention to what you're being forced to buy.  (Often books written by the professor who teaches your class.) . If you are a teacher, listen and try to learn literally anything from words which are rearranged to sell books.  If you are a parent, be outraged that your tax dollars are being spent to buy books (and seminars) for teachers who should already know how to do their jobs. 

Make getting a degree in education more difficult.  Require advanced degrees.  Pay teachers more.  Expect more from students. 

Check, check. 

The less we expect from our students, the less they will participate. 

Mental Floss (aka mental illness)

If almost everyone acknowledges that mental illness is the cause of mass shootings, suicide, and egregious health care costs, what the fuck are we doing as a country to fix this problem?

Health care costs are out of control.  I cannot afford to send my child to therapy, even though I have mafia-style insurance mediation as a member of the teacher's union.  How can people take care of themselves, let alone their children, when they can't afford to pay for basic mental health care?  If my child goes to therapy twice a week, I pay roughly $300/month.  WITH insurance.  That's utter bullshit.  Theres a reason people don't seek out mental health care.

(Disclaimer:  I am not a racist.  I am not against immigration.) 

When illegal immigrants can get health care which is better than mine, I  now have a problem.  An Emergency Room visit costs me, at minimum, $1200.  People who use the system (ERs) as primary care treatment pay nothing.  Nothing.  That's a great number for them.  I would love to pay nothing for the medical issues which affect me and my family.  I would love to not be stupidly in deep debt just to take myself and my children to the doctor.  Total bullshit.

Here's what DOESN'T help:  a border wall.  People will get over or under or around the wall.  The change has to come from United States government intervention, legislating properly.  I'm not talking about hurting people.  I'm not talking about separating families or putting immigrant children in stupid-ass government-funded holding pens.  I'm talking about REAL change, not just words that look good behind a politician on a banner.  (Like "Make America Great Again.") .

As Americans, can we PLEASE get our collective shit together and help each other?!  We ALL have issues, mentally and personally and financially, so there's no reason to be partisan and vote with an "R" or a "D:  Choose (vote for) people who will improve the country, not suck the president's dick.  (I get that the last sentence is inflammatory, but I think we are past political correctness at this point.)

Let's actually make America great again, by taking care of the mental health of the American people.