Education on Fire

So ... I accidentally lit some of my student's papers on fire the other night when I was grading them.  Is this a sign?

One of my former students told me yesterday that they loved my class, but they didn't read a single book in the curriculum all year.  I thought about slapping him, but I didn't.  I metaphorically vomited in his face instead.

The state writing test was yesterday and today.  The students' job is to persuade the state of something.  It would be really great if the prompt was persuasive, but ... it wasn't.  It rarely is.  I wonder what bunch of mouth-breathers makes up these prompts. Oh, and then the entire system crashed, suspending many students' answers somewhere in midwestern cyberspace.  Good stuff, government.

I have a typewriter in the back of my room, on which teenagers periodically type.  Here is what I read today:
     "---'s hairline makes me want to drink bleach."
     "I applied for a job at Hooter's yesterday, but I didn't get it because of my extensive obesity."
     "Here is my memoir:  'everyone sucks'."
     "My --- teacher keeps picking his nose, and I want to punch him in the back of his head, so his finger gets inserted in his gray matter."

When I asked students why they don't want to go to post prom, they said, "because they don't have ... Mountain Dew, you know?"  Yes, I know.  I was in high school once.  But don't talk to me in code about your underage drinking.  It just makes me want to tell your parents I saw you selling weed in the cafeteria or something - just to see what happens.

And ... MOST of my students are perfectly normal and lovely human beings.  Thank you, those people, for being kind, and not treating me like an inanimate object planted solely to annoy you.