High School, and The Art of Not Thinkinig

I was just thinking (shocking, I know) about what kind of Bouncing Betty of a job I currently have.  In a high school, everywhere I step is potentially a load of shrapnel to the face.

Every time I present ideas in class, I am accused by some group of students of trying to convert people to a certain cause or ideology.

Examples:

I said the word "socialism" in class the other day (reading from Kurt Vonnegut), and then said that America has many socialistic programs (welfare, social security, public schools, Medicare ...), and thus, I am a communist.  Nevermind that those two words are NOT the same; when you're 16 years old, apparently all words are interchangeable and offensive, depending on what KoolAid your parents are feeding you.

I also talked about transgender bathrooms a couple days ago (for the record, I was against the idea, because it seems like another form of segregation), but what they heard is that I am a flaming lesbian espousing the homosexual agenda in classrooms across America.

Today, when reading from an essay written by a philosophy teacher who played college and then professional football in the 1970s, I talked about sports injuries and how people sometimes live vicariously through athletes (armchair quarterbacks, etc), and I was accused of hating sports and not supporting high school athletics.  (Nevermind the fact that I coached all my kids when they were little and have watched about five thousand games of various kinds and watched my son tear his body and brain apart playing high school football - being supportive even when I wanted to throw up from nervousness on the bleachers.)  Apparently, I hate sports.  (go Bears)

So I guess when I taught Machiavelli's "The Prince" I was supporting deceit, manipulation, and murder.  And then (god help me) when we read part of Hitler's Mein Kempf" I was supporting the idea of  murderous dictators.  And of course when we read "The Glass Castle" I must have been subliminally telling students to abuse and neglect their children.  And obviously, when we read Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal", I was literally telling them that we should eat Irish babies in order to fix the economy.

Holy shit.  Never underestimate the ability of teenagers to twist ANYTHING and EVERYTHING you say into something which you DID NOT say at all.  (Actually, I did SAY all of those things out loud, but they were quite clearly presented as someone else's ideas.)

I appreciate those students who get it - we're learning about ideas - but I want to punch those who put their asinine, skewed reality onto what I say.  And if this were back in the day when I went to school, the students would just bitch about it after class or something, but now they're tweeting their bullshit during class.  Maybe if they stopped to THINK for a second and put their goddamn phones down, they'd know what was going on in real time.

Addendum:  The Pledge of Allegiance is optional.  It is absolutely AMERICAN to not say it on demand.  People can respect the United States of America  and not stand up North-Korean-style to say words at a flag.  dissent is the foundation of America.