I woke up this morning to a household full of people trying to get ready for an early showing of Star Wars.
The youngest couldn't find her pants, so I went to help, grabbed a sweatshirt out of her closet, and knocked a lava lamp off her dresser. Obviously, it shattered all over the floor, but my main concern was, "what the fuck is in these things?!" It was the most disgusting, chemical smell ever, and I almost immediately had a contact high/migraine from the disgusting pseudo-hippie fumes emanating from the floor.
So I picked up the pieces (more contact high there, but through the pores of my skin ...), then mixed a bucket of cleaning fluid and water to mop with. No sooner had I moved the bucket out of the sink, then the handle broke off, splashing Lysol cleaning fluid ALL OVER ME. What the fuck?!
So I clean that up and mopped the chemical soup off my daughter's floor.
Of course, I was properly pissed by then, so I angrily dusted my bedroom. Obviously angry dusting is counterproductive, because I accidentally knocked a full can of diet Dr Pepper off the shelf, which sprayed all over me and everything else in the vicinity. (Yes, I should I have seen the fucking can, but I didn't, okay?)
So ... I made a mimosa and am writing down this shitty start to my day in order to start fresh again.
Perhaps (optimistically) karma will come around later today. I think I've gotten all the rough moments out of the way for this particular day. Providing I didn't poison myself with lava juice, life shall be better for now.
Peace.
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