I would like to briefly rant about Christmas, Hanukkah, Druid Pagan Solstice, Kwanzaa and Ramadan.
What the fuck?
I spend an inordinate amount of time carefully choosing presents for the people I love, but my catholic guilt makes me feel bad for not buying secondary people presents, not buying some people enough presents, and not being in the properly festive mood. Can someone PLEASE tell me how to get back to the Charlie Brown spirit of Christmas where I belong? I hate to admit that the catholic elementary school taught me to properly sing carols and play Christmas music on the piano and make holiday crafts, whereas my agnosticism makes it largely impossible to get in the spirit. I don't need either the Jesus birth scenario nor the ho-ho-ho bullshit - I just want to hug it out with the druid solstice. I can't even manage to do that! I don't feel like it is Christmas!! How do I get there?!
I bought a bunch of cool shit for my kids, but my husband and I decided not to buy each other gifts, since we are a fucking sham of a couple. This essentially means that I will not be receiving Christmas gifts from someone who loves me. ( I realize my children love me, but I fund their purchases, which takes away from the generosity and foresight of a properly thought-out gift.) I swear to god, my students have done a better job reading me than my husband will, because he's never home and has no sense of romanticism in his body.
Breaking point. How can I love something so much and not be paired with a person/people who have no regard for what makes me happy? I've done something terribly wrong, I think.
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