Amy Poehler, Part II

Yes, I'm still reading Amy Poehler's book.  I can't blow through a book in two days like I used to - I find myself setting the book down and wandering off in the middle of it, because I should be doing something more productive (and then, subsequently, NOT doing anything productive).

But I just read a phrase in her book which reflects my tendencies exactly:  TRAGEDY PORN.

Amy and I have this fetish in common, apparently, but until she named it for me, I didn't know what I was engaged in.  "Tragedy porn" is filling oneself up with every horrible detail about the latest horrible event and telling everyone about it.  (To be fair, I don't talk to that many people, so I mostly just go over the details (incessantly) in my mind.  On any given day, the New York Times puts me in a mentally catatonic state.  I am absolutely horrified by the depravities of human beings, yet I can't stop reading the newspaper.  (Yes, I'm old - I still read newspapers.)

As a side note, I sort of feel the same way about PORN porn.  I have seen porn clips in the past, and while there is an (extremely tiny) part of my brain that understands why some people watch it, the vast majority of my brain is totally mortified.  Questions which cross my mind when seeing porn including the following:  Why?!  More specifically, how did these people find other like-minded people who wanted to record themselves having sex?  Is porn really all about either narcissism and/or low self-worth?  Does anyone REALLY like getting fucked in the ass?!  What would these girls' mothers do if they saw their children getting fucked on film, for creepy internet trollers to see?

(As I have said before, I think too much.  I get it.)

But back to this tragedy porn, why do I keep reading the paper if all it does is make me sad for humanity?  Why do I feel compelled to talk to other people about the heinous murders and rapes and general stupidity happening around the world, when (in all probability) no one even cares?  Do people think I'm slightly off-balance when I get wound up about referees getting murdered after soccer matches?

There is no answer to any of these questions, and I will most definitely keep reading the New York Times, and I will also keep trying to talk to other people (this blog entry is a notable example) about my unease about the state of world affairs.

Sorry, people.  I care, even though I try very, VERY hard not to.