I am utterly, completely, absolutely disgusted by the state of the world. Seriously. Does anyone read the paper? Watch the news? Read periodicals? Everything is absolutely going to shit. The only reassuring thing is that if one looks back at the history of mankind, things have always seemed to be going to shit, so chaos must just be the norm. It’s not possible that the world is on the brink of collapse. Is it … ?
People are starving to death RIGHT NOW in Somalia. Dead children. Parents who can’t physically take their children to get help, because they’re dying themselves. How does this affect me? It doesn’t. Obviously, (or I wouldn’t be writing about it) this famine affects my sense of white, ex-Christian guilt, but it doesn’t change my day. When I was reading the newspaper with breakfast, I forced down the rest of my piece of toast. I wanted to throw it away because I was repulsed by the photo of a malnourished, suffering, African child on the front page, but when I got to the trash can, I thought about wasting food, so I choked the rest of the toast down.
How can we all go about our days, going to work, eating breakfast, running errands, lounging with a book, gardening, playing video games, watching television, drinking cocktails, (insert more inane activities here), when people are enduring the most painful, grievous deaths imaginable?
More bad news? Certainly: the Syrian army is butchering people who disagree with them, Libyans are in fear for their lives because of tribal power struggles, the American government is trillions of dollars in debt and about to lose its economic power, a Norwegian psychopath just killed 76 people (mostly children) because of his radical religious beliefs, immigrants are showing up in countries around the world and demanding social services which bankrupt economies, political leaders worldwide are acting like the rules of the social contract don’t apply to them (which apparently they don’t).
Actually, I can’t continue this list, because it makes me want to puke.
I just want to be. I am sick and tired of hearing about the debt ceiling and worrying about not being able to pay my bills and acquiring new personal debt and all the other daily bullshit when other people around the world are in serious and real danger of dying … today … right now. And here I am buying anti-wrinkle cream. Something is very awry when the world is in such disarray. Peoples’ priorities should be at least similar if not the same: live, love, laugh, right? Isn’t that what all those cheesy, stupid plaques say? The front section of the New York Times is about dying Somalians, and the Style Section is about rich little cunts from wherever who are at fashion camp. Really? The imbalance is jarring.
I want to quit my job, cash in my retirement, max out the cash advance limit on my credit cards, and just disappear to an island nation where I can watch the ocean, read books, and enjoy my family. Oh, but wait, I can’t do that. Why? Because all the island nations will soon just be ocean because of the vastly changing climate. Or because those nations are struggling with oppressive debt or cholera or money-thirsty dictators. Fuck.
I really, really wish that I was like the millions of other people on the planet who just plow through their day without worrying about anything. Just wake up, go to Starbucks, go to work, go home, bond with the family a little, then go to bed in my house. Seriously, even the poor people in America have it better than the people in the really fucked up countries, and GREAT BIG AMERICA can’t figure out how to take care of its own people properly. We suck. The world sucks.
What are we supposed to do? Keep drinking ourselves happy every night? Keep pretending that all the blight in the world has nothing to do with us? Keep paying $5 for a 50-cent cup of coffee? I’m paralyzed with indecision and repulsion. I can’t be the only one without a plan B, and when the shit hits the fan, we’ll all just be watching. Not doing anything. Because, after all, we’re okay. Who gives a shit what the rest of the world is like … right?
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